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The questions that you ask yourself determine your future. So it’s critical that you learn how to ask yourself the kind of questions that help you create the future that you desire.

Now let me give you an example. I’m standing on the bed of the Animas river here in Durango, Colorado. And if instantly this river flooded and swept me into the water, I could ask myself, “Why did that just happen? How did that happen?” But the only relevant question is, “Where is dry land and how do I get to it?”

If I can ask myself those kind of questions, then it’s going to save my life. If I start wondering about what caused the flood, or what caused the difficulty, I’m going to drown.

Let me give you a real life example. When my career started, I was originally trained to do something called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, better known as CBT. And I was working for an agency where they mandated all of their employees to use CBT. But it didn’t really fit for me. It wasn’t really a good fit.

And then I discovered Solution Focused Brief Therapy. And it was literally like coming home. It was like the language I wanted to speak to my clients. And as I started doing Solution Focused Brief Therapy work with my clients, my bosses didn’t like it because I was going against what everybody else was doing.

And they would say things to me like, “Solution Focused Brief Therapy is not evidence based. It doesn’t lead to long term change. You can’t make any money in therapy doing Solution Focused Brief Therapy.” And they were trying to talk me out of doing it.

And I asked myself, “What if they’re wrong? What if all of that is not true?” And that gave me permission to keep going. And here we are now.

This is my 400th episode of the SFBT Moments, which is by far the most popular video series in the entire field. I’ve written now six books. My 6th book is coming out in a couple months. Six books. I’ve traveled the world teaching Solution Focused Brief Therapy. I’ve changed this approach, I’ve impacted this approach, I’ve changed this community, I’ve changed the therapy world, and I’ve made millions of dollars in business teaching people how to do it. And I don’t say that to brag.

I say that because all the way back at the beginning of my journey, all of those people were wrong. And I learned to ask myself the kind of questions that were in line with the kind of future I wanted to have. And I now have a future where I run the largest training organization in the entire field of Solution Focused Brief Therapy. I now live in a world where I travel all around the world meeting really cool people, doing really cool things, and teaching Solution Focused Brief Therapy and sometimes exposing Solution Focused Brief Therapy to large audiences on television and radio and podcasts.

This life is a dream way beyond what I ever could have thought I could have imagined. Earlier today, somebody asked me, “Is this everything I dreamed it would be?” And the only answer I could give is, “I never dreamt this far.” So I can’t even say this is or isn’t what I dreamt it would be because this is so far beyond my dreams. I never expected to be here.

And again, I don’t say any of this to brag. I say it because who are the people in your life that are doubting you? Who are the people in your life that are trying to talk you out of doing something because it makes them uncomfortable? Who are the people in your life who are trying to discourage you? What if they’re equally wrong as the people who did that to me?

What would your future look like if you just kept going and believed in yourself? What would your life look like one day if you just kept going and pursued your goals and dreams, no matter what anybody else said? What impact would that have on your future and how your future evolved?

These are the kind of questions I want you to train to ask yourself. Because when you ask yourself these kinds of questions, it changes your life. It changes your future.

My life is a real example of that. And I share all these things with you to inspire you to do the same thing. Because I’m promising you, there are people in your life saying all these discouraging things, but they’re wrong. And if you just keep going, you’ll discover exactly how wrong they are.

And if you want to get really good at asking yourself these kind of questions, the kind of questions that will impact your life and the way your future unfolds, my colleague and best friend and I, Dr. Adam Froerer, we just wrote a book called Change Your Questions, Change Your Future. And you can pre order it right now. We’ll put the link in the notes of this video. You can pre order that book. It comes out in August, but pre order it now. We got some cool bonuses to all the people that pre order.

This is our mission, to get the whole world good at asking themselves the kind of questions that make a difference.

I think one of the things that’s wrong with people’s mental health is we talk to ourselves in a way that is not productive. This book is going to show you exactly how to ask yourself the kind of questions that are productive and get your life moving in the direction that you’d like it to.

I can’t believe I’m standing in one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever been in Durango, Colorado. I’ve been here for a couple of days for some meetings and I can’t believe how amazing and beautiful it is.

And if Elliot in 2005 and six and seven would have known this, it would have made me even that much more resilient. But because of the way I was asking myself questions and talking to myself, I didn’t know it looked like this, but I knew… I knew I needed to keep going. And I’m so glad I did.

So this book, this video, this message is to encourage you to keep going so you can discover just how wrong everybody is who’s doubting you. And you can ignite that thing inside of you that’s going to transform your life simply by changing the kind of questions you ask yourself.