For the past few weeks I have been all over the place, but, I can honestly say I am not sure I have ever been this happy. On my walk today I started to think about why and I realized I had triggered a Solution Focused ripple effect in my life. This video is about how I did that, and how you can do it too.
Well, I’m finally home. I have been on the road for about the past three weeks, a lecturing, well hosting an event in Taos, New Mexico and annual conference that I host and teaching in the UK. And I just went for a walk, like one of my favorite things to do every weekend and it’s, I take a walk and I was, I was walking and I w you know, I’ve been thinking for the past couple of days. It’s like, what am I going to talk about in my, in my video this week. And the one thought I couldn’t get out of my head is like how happy I’ve been in the past couple of weeks. Like I could almost say that this is the happiest I’ve been in my entire life. So as I was walking I was thinking like, what is making me this happy? Like what exactly is it? Like nothing really profound has changed in my life recently.
Nothing is too terribly different. Like nothing has happened that I can think of. But what is it that it was like making me so happy and I’m going on this walking and just thinking and I realized, I think I know what it is like for the past few weeks I did a video series that I called, uh, 10 scenarios where solution focused brief therapy, uh, shouldn’t have worked but did. And, and my point was I wanted to make videos that would show people the true essence and nature of the solution focused approach. I think that I hear so many rumors and people saying like, I like solution focused brief therapy, but it can’t work with people with serious problems or we’re trauma, whatever. But that’s not true. And not only is it not true from a research perspective, it’s not true, uh, in, in, in the clinical realm.
It’s not clue true in our work. So I thought if I shared like 10 scenarios that were like so hard and so tricky and so complicated that no one would have logically thought that an approach like this solution focused way of working would have made a difference. But it did that that would, that would like convey to people like this is how amazing this is approached it. So that’s why I didn’t make 10 videos. And I think the accidental consequence of me sharing those 10 stories of like hope and strength and power is I actually think I was happier doing it cause 10 consecutive days telling these stories. I think it impacted my life and caused me to just walk around with a little bit more of a pep in my step, a little bit more happy and a little bit more thrilled. And it reminded me like that actually makes sense to me.
I remember a few years ago this organization asked me if I would give a lecture about something called secondary trauma. Now those of you who may not be familiar with that term, secondary trauma is like as a therapist and you work with people experiencing trauma, the therapist gets secondary trauma from being exposed to the trauma of the client. Well, if that’s true, then this other idea that I actually first from guy named Johnny Kim, a researcher, a brilliant researcher in solution focused therapy named Johnny Kim. Uh, that secondary resilience is also equally true. And that is if I spend a lot of time working with clients and watching their strength and their abilities and their hope and their love and all of those things come back into their lives, then I get secondary resilience. And I think in the past couple of weeks, I’ve just gotten like secondary happiness from telling all of these stories of wonderful people.
And I think the reason I want to share this with you, as I as I think two reasons, uh, number one is maybe what makes solution focused brief therapy so magical is it ignites that positive part of your client’s life. Because when we get impacted by a problem, we spent a lot of time thinking about it, talking about it, invested in it. But when we talk about strength and power and hope and love, like something else happens. And then the other thing is, so not only like maybe this is why SFBT works, but like be aware that working in this way we’ll probably give you secondary resilience and secondary hope and secondary love, uh, because that’ll have a tremendous impact on your life. I say all the time that using solution focused brief therapy, uh, not only has it impacted the life of my clients, but it’s also impacted my life.
And in the past couple of weeks I’ve had like a very real experience of that. So I hope this video like resonates with you and let you know that like there is so much more of a ripple effect from having these positive conversations than just the client’s problem going away. Something happens in your life too. If you let it in and you let it ripple through your world, it’s the greatest thing in the world. And, uh, I might just keep doing series like this because like I’m, I feel like I’m walking on a little bit of cloud nine and, and things are going well. Um, just kind of happy. So I hope this video touches you and engages you to have a bit of happiness as well. So please leave a comment below and you know what I’d like you to do? Tell me something positive that has happened in your life in the past week or so in the comments of this video so that you can start the ripple of the positive effect happening in your life too. Thank you for watching this video. Please subscribe to my youtube channel, like my page, share this video, head on over to Elliott, connie.com for more free videos and more training material and information about my schedule. Thank y’all. And I see you in the next video.