Why Negative Energy is Weak

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So I recently joined a high level business mastermind group, and we’ve been meeting for the past couple of days. And I want to share with you a lesson that I picked up from this process that’s really, really relevant to Solution Focused practitioners. In fact, I think it kind of highlights, kind of gets to why Solution Focused Brief Therapy works with clients and how it makes an impact and a difference in our client’s lives.

So, you know, when I started my business life, I was just out of graduate school, I got my license and, you know, I’m a trained Psychotherapist. I’m a licensed Psychotherapist, but I’m not a businessperson, but I’ve never been taught. I don’t have an MBA. I don’t know anything about business and I’m not an entrepreneur by training. So I went and I started my private practice and I started writing books and being invited to travel all over the world. And now I run one of the, in fact, the largest online training business in our entire field.

So I wanted help, like how do you run a business on this level? Cause I want to be able to reach more people and serve them with training material, and I want to do a good job. So I got access to this group and they accepted me in, it’s a really small kind of intimate mastermind being led by one of the top business people in the world. And it’s cool, right? I’m in this group with a bunch of businesses that you’ve probably heard of. Businesses you probably utilize your daily life and I get access to all these things.

And one of the things we did on the first day was we all kind of talked about our business history. And I talked about my journey as a business person and people would ask me questions. And one of the questions someone asked me was how did you go from where you started to where you are? Like it’s such an interesting journey as an individual psychotherapist in private practice to now,

you know, running this big, massive business, like how did you do that? And it ended up as a conversation about overcoming obstacles and in this field, even you know, helping professionals, even in Solution Focused I have had many, many obstacles. And oftentimes those obstacles were in the form of people who didn’t want to see me successful right.

There were people in his field who wanted to interrupt my ability to grow and prosper and did hurtful malicious, unethical, immoral things to try to stop me. And yet I overcame and here I am and people were asking me, how did you do that? And my answer was, so I genuinely believe that negativity and negative energy is weak, like it’s not strong.

If you push on it hard enough and long enough, it will crumble. I think that positive energy and things that come from your purpose and your drive, will always win, always. So the thing about negative energy is like, you can push on it, you can lean on it, you can outlast it and it will get will crumble, dissipate, dissolve and go away.

You know, the people that tried to do these horrible things to me and I am like working really hard, not to say their names because I, so I want to just be like, but they know who they are. They’re watching the video, they know who they are. They are not prominent in the field anymore. And they’ve oftentimes moved on because of the landscape of the world has changed and you can’t be bigoted, biased, racist. You can’t be those things that were leading those people treating me so badly. And, and, and, you know, you lean on it with positive energy and with purpose and with drive and you just outlast them and they just go away.

I think that also manifests itself in Solution Focused conversations itself, because I think the things that pop up as problems in our client’s lives is like that negative energy. But one of the things that a Solution Focused conversation does is it reconnects your client with their purpose and their internal drive and their best selves. And when they take that, their purpose, their drive and their best self, and they confront the problem

and lean on the problem and push through the problem, it crumbles and allows them to grow and prosper in a whole new way. And when I think about my work with clients over the years, like one of the things I find so amazing is when you watch someone like rediscover who they are and get back in touch with who they want to be, you really watch them like evolve and grow and become this like new iteration of themselves. That’s really connected to who they have always been until the problem showed up. And when they use that energy to like confront battle and go through the problem, they always come out on the other side better because the problem will crumble and will go away.

And you know, it sounds like an odd idea, but in my entire life that has been reinforced and confirmed more times than I can count. Long before I became a psychotherapist, like, just as a young person struggling with the things I was struggling with as a child, just knowing that love wins, positivity wins, purpose wins, and your work as a Solution Focused Brief Therapist is to have a conversation with your client that gets them re in touch with their purpose, their drive, the love for themselves and their best selves, because that’s how they win and overcome their problem. That’s what your work is about. Helping clients get in touch with that part of themselves.